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Full Spectrum Cycling
Full Spectrum Cycling 291 – Chequamegon MTB Festival – Stolen Cargo Bike – Abus Locks – SS Milwaukee Song
Feb 6, 2025
Full Spectrum Cycling 291 – Chequamegon MTB Festival – Stolen Cargo Bike – Abus Locks – SS Milwaukee Song
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Transcript
0:00
[heavy metal music] Oh yeah.
0:20
Oh yeah. You got that right. Us Fat Bottomed Boys, we make the rocking world go 'round. That's what they say. Hey everybody, it's Full Spectrum Cycling. This is show 291. You got new headphones? Uh, like a long time ago.
0:35
Okay. Thank you. Probably- Did you shine them up?... six months ago... probably opened my eyes and finally looked at you. Maybe. [laughs] I don't know. I don't look at you that often. Yeah. Uh, anyway. Ah.
0:47
Yeah, show 291, so that's what's going on here in, uh, in Milwaukee tonight. What else is going on here in Milwaukee? More, more, uh, bike theft. We... Oh, is there another one? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Oh.
1:00
It was a, it was a Yuba cargo bike, electric. Come on. A blue one. You might have seen it around. The spicy curry or... No, that's the- Uh, it's got... It's an electric. Okay. I, I think it's a factory electric.
1:14
Where, uh, where from and what's the deets? Um, over on Burleigh somewhere. Oh, shit. Huh. Um, and he said just two days before they tried to nick it from his backyard too. Oh, man.
1:27
So that's one of the reasons why I kinda reached out to ABUS and said, "Hey guys, got this, uh, angle grinder thing going on here in Milwaukee," and I was curious how this lock here specifically...
1:42
That lock is as much- The, the Granite Super Extreme 2500. That weighs the same as my child. Right. [laughs] It is a little hefty. And my child's big.
1:52
But it takes- But if you're electrified- But, uh, there's several, several... I don't wanna destroy that one with an angle grinder, 'cause that would be silly. Right.
2:00
We'll figure out how it works and where we can put it and stuff like that, do a story on it and whatnot. But there's several videos on the, uh, interwebs already, and it takes...
2:11
You can get through one side of it with a couple discs in between three and a half and four minutes. But it's so strong that you can't get anything out of it, so you have to cut the other side.
2:22
So now you're up to like- Three or four minutes... now you're, like, up to eight minutes. And- Hopefully by then you've been beaten to death... and, and you need a pack of discs too. You're probably- Right...
2:29
going through six discs to do all that. Maybe you could use- So, and then-... one of those discs to kill yourself... right, like a shuriken- Right... throwing star. Into the neck. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
2:38
So that time to cut through doesn't include changing the discs either. Oh. Which, what does that take, 30 seconds per? That's why I always carry four cutters with me. [laughs] Joking.
2:52
Uh, so, you know, I mean, if, if it's gonna take 10 minutes to get through that thing, I'm pretty sure that's relatively safe. One would... Yeah.
3:01
At least for stuff that's parked outside and not in someone's garage where you got all- And not for a weekend... yeah, all day t- and all night to deal with it. Right.
3:09
Um, you would think somebody would notice something after 10 minutes of noisy grinding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or your neighbors are assholes. Yeah. Even that. Could be that too.
3:18
I mean, yeah, at least- Yeah, point that thing at your mouth just a little more, you're... Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Get in there. Get in there. Yeah. Can you hear me now? Yeah, I can hear you now. Okay. I'm gonna have a beer.
3:27
The dulcet tones of Mr. Tony Burger. Ooh. Uh, the other thing over by Tony that weighs about a million pounds is actually an anchor that goes into the ground. So, you know, you...
3:38
Or into a concrete wall perhaps, if your garage is made out of concrete. Concrete or brick. Right. And then there's an extra super long chain there. Yeah. Yeah. Long. And, uh, I- Ooh, that's a long one. Yeah. Yeah.
3:51
And, and so, you know, once it's anchored in the floor, you know, like for a motorcycle I could see that being semi-easy to use with this thing- Right... or a bike. Right. Yeah. But, you know, if it's...
4:03
Y- you'd have to make a sp- specific area for it, and then attach that thing to the floor and that thing to deal, and you would be pretty good I'd think. See, this might be cool in my garage,
4:14
mounted to the floor with that on it, and cameras, so when someone does start cutting it, I can use the weapons- Oh... that are there to shoot them- That-... while they're cutting it...
4:26
that's where Pee-wee Herman got it wrong- But, I mean, it all seems to make sense... with his heavy- Right... when he got it heavy. I mean, he had all the chains, he had it wrapped and da, da, da, da, da, da, da.
4:34
But he did not have the weapons right. I can't wait. Does your, uh, does your garage have a window that you can see from your deck? Yep.
4:41
So you could just park the bike right in front of there, right inside there and- Yep. Yeah. Shoot the beanbags. Pa-pow. Shoot. Do a- I wouldn't be shooting beanbags. Little, little practice. Rock salt. Little practice.
4:50
I mean- Castle law, baby. Castle law. Hey, if this ever gets to that stage, you know what I'm shooting? Oh, g- t- You know what I'm aiming for?... hold my beer. Wait for it. [laughs] Wait, you know what I'm aiming for?
4:58
Just so you guys know. Jesus. I'm telling everyone in the world right now, if we get to this stage and I see someone trying to steal my bike, and I'm watching them, I'm aiming for the balls.
5:08
[laughs] I wanna make certain that this thing cannot recreate. Yeah. Could send a bunch of condoms to Hamas too. Maybe they want it. They... Yeah, that's all. [laughs] Oh, Jesus, God, we've already gone into politics.
5:20
Do they stand- I was just-... balls small? Yeah. I don't know. Uh, yeah, I, I don't know how many condoms they dropped over Vietnam back in the day, but- They were big... too many. They were like this big.
5:31
They were like- Oh, like Frank from, uh, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Yeah. [laughs] "Oh, excuse me, I dropped my oversized condom from... for my magnum cock." [laughs] Always Sunny. Always Sunny. Oh. Good show.
5:46
Always a good- Good show... always funny on Always Sunny. Always DeVito. All right. So the, the lock thing, we'll have some s- pictures and some stories and stuff and yeah, I just- Potentially a dead human...
5:57
stuff getting stolen is just getting out of hand. It is really ridiculous in River West right now. It's absurd. Well, it's not just here though. I mean- Yeah... it's, Portland is, it, there's-... tons of stuff there.
6:08
There was an article from, or I think it was in Bicycle Retailer, about, uh, bike index estimating that 2.4 million bikes are stolen every year. And only 100,000 plus have been repor- Are recovered...
6:22
have been reported on bike index, 1.3 million registered on bike index, so there are people using it. But the, the, the thing out there was the same as here, lack of police response. Right. You know?
6:34
Guy has $5,000 bike stolen, had an Air Tag on it. Not doing anything. Got a cop to say, "We'll make a, a thing, you know, a, a report, uh, and we'll check it out." Nothing. Couple weeks later, what's up with that?
6:46
Can't find it anymore. Thoughts and prayers. Thoughts and prayers. Can't find it anymore. Thoughts and prayers. In the end, they found the Air Tag alongside the garage.
6:54
They did arrest a guy, but it was, like, two months later. Right. Yeah. Anyway, that's enough about stolen bicycles. All I know is- Yeah... I still miss- My blood pressure's starting to get up...
7:04
[laughs] still miss my s- It was already up there from the day's, uh- What?... bullshittery at work, wasn't it? Oh, yeah. [laughs] There's that. There's that. Then, oh, yes, ramp it up, and I'm thinking of a...
7:14
But I, I did have, I had the reclamation story. When the, when the, uh, wheel set got ripped off outside of Towner. Yep. That was a good one. And just flooded the socials. You did as well. I did- Yeah...
7:27
massively and then ah. And- They, they suddenly appeared. Yes, they did. [laughs] Yes, they did. I mean- Every time- Sometimes-... you are near...
7:35
sometimes it, there is a happy story out of it They wanna be close to you. That's clean living, 'cause I still don't have my wheels back that someone stole.
7:41
It is j- sometimes- Speaking of wheels, there's a wheel right there for you... it may. Dude- I know. I might leave that home... it's play Pass Your Luck, man. No whammies, no whammies.
7:48
You just hit it every time there's a fucking whammy then. Lucky you. I know. I get the, wow, holy shit. Whoa, 10,000 and another spin? Okay. Well, I bet you didn't wanna, yeah. Let's see what happens.
7:58
There was a, uh, there was a song apparently written about the SS M- Milwaukee. I listened to it today. Did you? [laughs] It was on WMSC. Oh, okay. Yeah, I listened to it on the, uh, on Milwaukee page.
8:09
It's- It's terrible... sort of pirate-ish. Oh, wait, wh- It's Gilligan's Island... is that the guys from- Sort of... uh, Milwaukee Record? It, well, it's- It is The, The Roaring Dans... The Roaring Dans is the band.
8:20
Oh, okay. Well, whatever. I, uh, that's fine. I haven't heard it yet, but- I'm not- You should, we can listen to it after the show. And I also cannot get- No, woo, I'm sure it's gonna be good...
8:28
speaking of let's just roll right into the, to the art auction, uh, I don't get why those two boat paintings are going for, uh, uh- 'Cause they're- The highest priced ones right now on the art auction You know why?
8:39
'Cause it's timely and topical. Right. I would like to- Haven't you seen our world? So- I'm sorry. There are little- I got outbid on my Von Mons... peo- little, little, little people just ding-dong, ding-dong, ding-dong.
8:49
Are you getting, you're going down Friday, right? Oh, yeah. So Friday in Milwaukee, here is the, uh, WMSC art auction. Uh- It's a good time. It is a good time, even if you don't win anything.
9:01
So far- You're not winning things, you're buying things- Well, you're winning the-... for a lot of money... you're winning the right to spend your money on them. I suppose. Mm-hmm.
9:09
Um- 'Cause I know Von Mons is gonna go for a lot more than I'm willing to bid, as much as I love the artist. It's the same thing I think about that, uh, Mark Winter piece there. Yeah, that's cool. I wanna get- I know.
9:19
That's gonna go, as soon as I saw it, I'm like, oh, Greg's gonna bid on this and it's gonna be really expensive. All right. So I'm winning one, two, three, four, five right now, and losing two. I'm winning two.
9:28
I'm winning two and losing one. I ain't paying attention until Thursday. Good call. I'm just kind of keeping up. I'm, I really, I, I'm looking at what I, I want and I like. Yep.
9:36
And, and- And some of them are out of range already. I already knew that part. The chess set's cool. Well, there... So- And some of them didn't make it- Yeah, there's another one similar to this. I like that. Yep. Yeah.
9:45
I would, that one, that one last year I got for a good price. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I forget exactly, but it wasn't silly. I wanna get, I, I- I w- this is kinda jealous... one of them, I, I'll, I'll tip my hand.
9:54
One of them is Billy's. Oh, really? Wow. Od- Odrock? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, if it- Yeah... if it comes in at the, at the cool- So just, I mean-... affordables-... I think our li-... and it's Billy...
10:06
I think our- Come on, man. I think our listener knows by now, but art, art, art, art on the door, that's all from the- 'Cause art rules... MSC art auction. You don't like art? This is- Fuck you.
10:17
You know where- Sorry, I just said that... if you, if you want some stuff that's- I'm made out of art... semi-affordable, if you like the style, at, uh, Uptowner right now, there's a lady that has a- My heart...
10:27
a, a showing- Yeah... in the back, so when you go out the rear door to the- Hmm... patio. Yeah, they have a actual event events. There's, I got, I already bought three. There's two of them over there.
10:35
[laughs] Those two right there? Yeah. Oh, those are cool. Okay. And yeah, those were, like, one of them, one of them was 25 bucks. Oh, really?
10:43
Actually, two of them were, the one that's still on the car was 25, and the other one was more, maybe 'cause the earrings are more expensive, but- Oh, that's cool. Those are at Uptowner? Yeah. Oh.
10:52
But I like the size because it's consistent with the album- Yeah, 12 by 12-ish... the album art size thing of all the other art and- Oh, I like those. Good job, Greg...
11:00
I just want people to have, if they're gonna use the studio, to have the ability to swap out stuff that doesn't look like this... What is this thing again? Uh, doing, doing, doing. Doing, doing, doing.
11:11
Doing, doing, doing. Uh, next Wednesday- Is?... it's the heart wall. Heart art wall. Oh, 'cause it's f- 'Cause it's got heart. Next Wednesday where? Uh, five to 8:00 PM at the Uptowner Multimedia Works by Theresa Waite.
11:28
Yes. Put that, post that in the notes 'cause I need to remember that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's got bigger pieces too that are, like, 30 by whatever. Big, bigger. Big, big, bigger. Um, and- Copy event walls now...
11:40
I got big links. Guess who she is, just because it's curious, is, uh- Theresa Waite?... Tyler Wadsworth's aunt. If you remember Tyler. Brown Tyler up- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:49
It's, like, his aunt or they grew up together. His aunt? Yeah. Oh. Oh, no shit. Wow. Something, something along those lines. [laughs] It's more like, more like, whatever. Long story short- Small Milwaukee... but yes.
11:58
Small Milwaukee hitting again. Long story short. Too late. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. All right. Cargo bike, SS Milwaukee song. Hmm.
12:07
You're, you're gonna get an annoyance- I, did, did you catch my latest note for- I was explaining the cool pedals, the invert, inverter Inverse Inverse I-N-V-R-S S. Okay.
12:20
Inverse pedals to- We all know Tony doesn't say things right I, I'm not good. [clears throat] I'm not good with words. [laughs] And I was, uh- Me from the edge...
12:27
my chiro- my chiropractor is also a cyclist, and I'm like, "Hey- Oh, hey... there they are." I put, I- Oh... so that, uh, uh, yeah, yeah Oh. Yeah, yeah. Those are nice Keen boots, too. Mm. Those are great Keen boots.
12:41
Probably will be, probably it'll be out of focus or whatever. But anyway, um, yeah, I took the old studs out. You can see where the grip studs were, 'cause it's- Oh, yeah...
12:51
kinda rusty, but then these boots just kind of, they made the pattern. It's like- Yeah, it's perfect... you kinda have to use what's there. Perfect. Um, so those are done, and, uh, pedals go on, uh, probably tomorrow.
13:02
So I mentioned to my chiropractor about these cool pedals- Pedals... and he brought up a, a, a secondary bonus that I didn't think about. Uh-huh. If you've got studs in your boots
13:15
and a car passes you too closely- Uh-huh... look at the damage you can do to that car. With your foot With your foot. Little Kia. Huh. A little Kia. Little, I- Oh...
13:23
I just think that's a j- You know, they- He said it to me, I'm like, "Oh, I'm g- I gotta bring that up on the podcast."
13:27
Well, they're like carbide, too, so they're gonna do some- They're gonna, they're gonna cause some serious damage... damage.
13:31
[laughs] I'm a kicker when- You know- When, when I'm slighted on a bike- And think about that with- Yeah... five or six, you know, studs in your kicker foot. Yeah. I d- well, remember I, I, I've told you. Yeah.
13:42
When I did the kick and it was an undercover cop. [laughs] I, I punched a bus one. And then also they followed me all the way home, and they're yelling their ass off at...
13:52
I, I had a day like today, where I was just like, I'm just bear- burrowing ass home, and it just like totally rolled a stop sign. Totally rolled it through and whatever. And I was like, "Fuck you."
14:01
And just made a little more connection than I thought I was going to, but- Oh, you, they rolled it? Yeah. Well, cops are supposed to stop. Right. Exactly. That was my yelling point- Lead by-...
14:11
until then, da da da da da, da da da da dee, ba da da da da. Okay, fuck you. Da da da da da. Lead by example. We don't have time for this. Of course not. You don't either. Yeah, it was right over by, uh, Vattugi's. Huh.
14:20
Or like that triangle park coming from, dropping in towards North Avenue. That, the triangle park. Yep. Yeah. You know what I'm talking about. Speaking of, uh, poor drivers- And boom, cha ting ta-dun then...
14:32
speaking of poor- And I lived on, uh, Cramer at the time, and I got all the way to the house, and they were like, "Yes." On, uh, on Saturday a tow truck, flatbed tow truck with a vehicle on it- Ah...
14:43
tried to turn into oncoming traffic on Holton to pass me because I wasn't driving fast enough. Huh. How'd that go? Uh, he didn't pass me. [laughs] I'm like, "You've gotta fucking be k- " Wow...
14:54
He honked at me first because I was turning onto Holton, and I wasn't going fast enough apparently. So the speed limit's 30, so I was doing 33, and he was aggravated by that. Oh, boy.
15:05
People got not enough time on their hands to- Apparently. He had a time- Yeah... he had a vehicle on the back. But did you do, did you get all the way- I did... to the top of the hill- I got up here...
15:14
by pushing the button? I got up here. You just- What is it? You're not riding your electric bike in the winter, are you? Nope. No. Um- I ride analog and it works. Yeah. JK picked up the beer today.
15:26
We've had this beer before. It was, yeah. I don't think we have. Have we had Turmoil Reaper? Well, we did- Yeah... 'cause there was a- Oh, oh, okay... I had a, uh, um, it was a variety 12-pack,
15:38
and it, there were a couple- I might've had one then. You might have one. Had, had- You m- you might not have been here, too. That's possible. It's possible.
15:43
I think you were not here when we had the fir- but we left one, and I think you had it the next week. I had it the next week. It'll happen. That'll, yeah. But I like it. It's an easy drinking 7.0. I like beer. 7%er.
15:54
Yeah, it's, uh, it's, it, it- Deceptive... it's an easy drinking 7%. Yeah, it is. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I, when I see 7 I'm like, "Ugh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."
16:02
And it's Three Floyds and they always have cool art. That's true. So. It is, uh, it is good artwork. It says, uh, if- I do have the one gripe that the, uh, the, the bi- uh, the canning process on this one [laughs]
16:17
didn't go through and I was risking filleting a thumb, where I had just- It's the other way, Greg... 10/24. 20- Yeah, it says it right on the box, too... 10/24. Whatever. Tony threw it on the ground.
16:31
I was, I was making a gumbo and I ended up burning my thumb while I was- Ooh... making it, and only about a, couple minutes into building my roux.
16:40
No one- And my roux takes 30 to th- 40 minutes- No one wants to know about you... to sit there and- Seems like a lot of ruin. Oh, dude, and you gotta be- Oh, well roux is where you gotta start...
16:49
well, you got, yeah, you gotta have the patience of a freaking saint- Chicken pot pie... maybe, man... gotta start with a roux. Holy, holy, holy. Chicken pot pie. It gotta be dark. It gotta be like dark chocolate.
16:58
Dark chocolate. Black, black almost. Speaking of, uh, chocolate, if anybody's passing through Mineral Point on their way west somewhere- Oh, yes...
17:07
past Madison, uh, Sean, our buddy, has had a restaurant there for a while, but apparently he's reopened, I don't know if it's still called Atomic Chocolates, but he's reopened the chocolate portion of his- Nice...
17:18
repertoire. Yeah, yeah. I love that. He makes awesome chocolate. Yeah. When, oh, man, when- Sea salt and caramel... Times Square Pizza? Oh, dude, that sounds delicious. Yeah, right. Where was Times Square Pizza? Exactly.
17:27
Oh, him. Same guy. Okay. Yeah. And they had the deli case, and the deli case just had all the chocolate. Any, any time you add- It was awesome chocolate...
17:33
salt to chocolate, especially caramel and chocolate, yeah, you're, you, you've got a winning combination. Yes. I agree. Isaac Hayes, AKA chef from South Park. Exactly. Isaac Hayes. He wants the chocolate salty balls.
17:45
Chef's salty chocolate balls, children. Is he still alive? [laughs] Oh, no. No, he died, right? Isaac Hayes, he's been gone for a while. After he left South Park. Jon Shaft. Yeah. Shut your mouth. Like a light bulb.
17:58
[laughs] Who is it? Hey, if you, uh, if, if you, uh, if you wanna go to a really fun event, uh, the Shawano Mountain Bike Festival's set for September 15th, 2025. Sign up now before it sells out.
18:11
And, well, actually you just can yesterday. If- Yep. 'Cause that sells out, doesn't it? It just went on sale yesterday. Uh, I th- that's a good question I know the Berkey they had a limit on.
18:22
I would assume they have a limit on it, I just don't know how many people do it anymore. That's up there in Cale, Wisconsin, though. You can register as of the 5th of February.
18:32
Speaking of that, uh, I ran into Joe Nadolski at, uh, Amorphic on Sunday, and he had done a serious trail ride and was... It was hilarious, 'cause he had his fatty.
18:44
He didn't have a bike lock for it, so it was leaning against the garage door at Amorphic, and he was covered in mud. I'm like, "Oh man, you've had a good ride." He literally, like, chest down, like, mud everywhere.
18:55
Like Milwaukee River trail ride? Yeah, yeah, he was trail riding. Oh. Oh, yeah. Well, I like going down there when it's sloppy.
18:59
I don't go down there when it's that wet either, but- Well, that was like that, uh, that- He definitely looked like he had a fun time... uh, jungle cross under the- Mm. Mm...
19:08
at the Home Depot under the bridge when that was all gnarly muddy and the... Oh. Kenny ate his derailer. Everybody did. Scanlan- Oh, man. That was a good one... everybody was just- Scanlan did too, yep. Yeah. Yeah.
19:19
Uh, and, uh, Kenny was even done. Yeah, he was over. He was done with it, and then we were- And then we were leaving... he was walking his bike and it went [mouth gørbling] [laughs] It just collapsed on itself.
19:28
It just sucked it all up in there, yeah. Oh, man, that was a bad one. Oh, God, yeah. I mean, it was fun to build the course. Just- I have that great picture of you guys holding- It was, it was like, ooh...
19:38
it's you, Lunz, and you, and one of you are holding, like, an ax and the other one's holding, like, a hubcap. I had a hubcap, I think. It's like one of my best pictures ever. Oh, and the machete.
19:47
Yeah, 'cause Mike, uh, Mike, Mike- Yeah, Mike, yeah, Mike was there too. Yeah... Mike Nadolski always ha- has, like, the best machetes. [laughs] He's like- That's a sign...
19:56
"I got this one from Vietnam" [laughs] and I'm like, "Yes" He does. He likes to collect machetes from foreign countries. And it's awesome. And yeah, they're... Oh, man, that thing was a l- that was awesome.
20:05
I mean, like Mike- Why has Mike never been on our fucking podcast, or Mike and Berta for that matter? Uh, we'll ask them- Just be a two-person show... before. Yeah, they should definitely show up some, someday.
20:13
They're fun people. And speaking of cycling and- Cycling. Uh, yeah, think they're actually going back- Cycling... to Vietnam one of these days. Uh, I think they might've already- They just-... gone and come back...
20:23
or did they just come back from Vietnam? Yeah, they came back from... Where? Cam- Cambodia maybe. Yeah. Somewhere over there. Speaking of that, uh- Southeast Asian. Yes... uh- Some place-...
20:31
Rob from Amorphic just got back from France for... France. Ha ha ha. From snowboarding. Yeah. And you, you gotta talk to him because it's the funniest story. He's like, he showed up and they d- they got nothing but
20:43
tons and tons of powder, and apparently the Europeans don't ride powder. What? So they showed up at this resort- So what about the skiing?... and there was literally no one there. [laughs] Wolfed it.
20:56
He's like, "Literally no one there" and they're like, "Really? People are afraid to ride in two feet of powder?" Mm. Which is, of course, a dream when you're a snowboarder in Colorado. I would imagine. Yeah.
21:06
So yeah, it's a pretty great story. He's got some great... And he had some photos that were absolutely stunning. Yeah, and they said that you, that they did it cheaper than going to Colorado.
21:14
Yeah, it's cheaper than going to Colorado right now. Yeah. Huh. Although he said you had to be careful which, uh, which lift you take, 'cause you could end up [laughs] in Switzerland- Oh...
21:22
and not be able to get back to your hotel. [laughs] Without taking a bus around the mou- Or hours- Yeah... of bus riding. Right. Yeah, yeah. Around the mountain. Here she comes, round- [laughs] That's funny... she comes.
21:32
Dee-dee-dee-dee. SS Minnow down at the lakefront. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Uh- Yeah... I- Okay, I think I got everything I needed out of that song from you. [laughs] I'll...
21:42
Don't worry, I'll, I'll fall into it when I- Yeah, guess where- Don't worry, tumble face into it... guess where, uh, mountain bikers are battling for access to trails again? Where mountain biking started.
21:53
Mount Tamalpais. Oh. Apparently there was a, a movement to get, like, six miles of trails reopened, 'cause they haven't been open since the '80s when those hooligans made everybody feel unsafe on all those trails.
22:03
Oh, yeah. Whatever. In the '80s you were hooligans. Hooligans, I say. Anyway, sounds like it's, uh, some, some judge put an injunction on it again, and it's still- Mm... in, out in the ether, but hopefully...
22:17
You know, it's the birthplace of mountain biking, for Christ sake. You got to. You gotta be able to ride a mountain bike out there. One would think. At least part, part of it. Yeah. No e-biking, though.
22:23
What about horses? Do they like horses out there? That's what I'm saying. Probably. Can we get Chewy and, uh, Spinner on the horse thing?
22:28
'Cause that's like the, uh, the- I don't wanna ever hear you say those words again... 'cause there's a horse thing in Decorah. Is there really? Horse shit in Decorah?
22:35
You know what else there is in Decorah apparently, and Chewy's all into it now? Ghosts. Oh. He's, he's doing the ghost story thing. He's getting ghost hunting equipment. Ah. I could see Chewy being a ghost hunter.
22:48
[laughs] Oh, yes. I got... We gotta get him on the show- Man... and talk about ghost hunting. I think that would- I haven't seen Chewy-... I think that would actually be-... in over a year, so...
22:54
probably a more in- Oh, should. Take him to my-... be a more interesting show than- Take him to my house... talking about this stuff... my house is haunted. By? Something. Oh, you? All right. Yeah. I don't know. I,
23:05
there's, there's some, there's some stuff going on in the house. Uh- Does it have anything to do with that bed, the bed- Lloyd... spring thing on the wall? Lloyd was having a...
23:13
L- Lloyd was over and he had, like, a, like, freak out. Oh, no. Well, there you go right there. I was there. You had Lloyd in your house. Yeah. Well, no, but I don't know. I was there.
23:20
He, he could be a- No, I was in the kitchen... he's kind of a divining rod. [laughs] Yeah. He's like... I was in the kitchen when something jumped off a shelf and nobody was near it.
23:28
I was standing there- Yeah, there's some kooky shit- Yeah... in that. Okay. You know? I mean, we just all coexist. We're being relaxed and groovy.
23:36
When you start buying equipment and diving into their business- [laughs]... that's when shit starts to go south. So, uh- Okay, I take it back... don't come by near my house. [laughs] I got s- I got slimed. Yeah.
23:47
[laughs] Um, speaking of that, I went to Donardo's retirement party, and he talked about your wedding being, like, the best family reunion he's had in ages. [laughs] Yes, it was. That was good. That was fun.
23:59
He's like, "I fu- suddenly felt like I was thrust into a family reunion." [laughs] That's how you treat it. Well, pretty much. So, uh, just gonna mention this Blue Sky thing again.
24:08
I noticed a bunch of friends now are signing up. I'm there. I know you guys are. I'm not. I will be soon. You, you, you'll be soon. Uh, last, last week we were at 30 million just under.
24:19
Now we're very close to 31 million for the- Wow... how many people are on it, so that's pretty good for a week. Yes, I'm getting close to following Trusty in the, uh- The, uh, Bezos boycott. Cut the Prime cord.
24:36
I don't know Oh, that's gonna be hard for us. That's a tough one. But, but- I know, I know, I know... yeah, I'll try... I know, I know. It, it's a tough one, but it's- All right...
24:43
I, I'm not gonna do it immediately- It's good-... but I'm, I'm good-... it's gonna be expensive for me... I'm gonna be a very difficult- So here's, here's a Bezos-...
24:49
weening of self off, and I don't really use it that a- I use it a lot... I use it a lot. Understood... I can just- So apparently-... be, do my part as you keep yours going. Yeah. Apparently- [laughs]...
25:01
you need a dumb calculator for some college classes. So Cleona's very fancy- It's called a pencil... well- A fucking phone has it... no. Yes. You can't use a phone either because you can program these devices.
25:14
So Cleona needed to buy some sort of business calculator- Oh, Casio... for her business class. It's a Casio, yep. Like a fucking old-timey- And ding, ding, ding, ding, dong... calculator...
25:23
so we order her this ridiculous calculator, and we have Amazon Prime, and it takes, like, over a week to show up. Well, they had to make it- And someone-... special in China just for her- Well, and someone probably-...
25:34
because nobody buys them anymore... and some- no, all college kids need this. Ah. And it's 40 bucks, and apparently- [laughs]... it got delivered and- Suckers... promptly someone stole it off my porch. Okay.
25:48
Porch pirate action. Porch pirate action. And I have a video of him, and he clearly saw my cameras, 'cause he never looked up at anything. Guess we're gonna need- So you ca-... to mount the camera now- Yep...
25:57
on the ground. Or I need the doorbell camera is what I'm thinking. Or the doorbell one sees straight ahead and down. Yeah, yeah, that's what I like about it. Get the fucking bear trap. So- Yeah...
26:05
Cleona's distraught that someone stole their fucking c- her calculator. So I'm like, "Okay, let's look at this." I go online. The calculator is available at Target for $10 less. Mm-hmm. Well, there you go.
26:22
In which case I look at Molly- And it's in stock... and Cleona and I'm like- Road trip... "You have 55 minutes to drive to Target and get this damn ca- this damn calculator." And they did, and
26:34
we got the refund from, from Tar- uh, from Amazon for someone stealing her calculator. Cleona saved $10 buying the cal- calculator online. You know, you spent $10 in gas- Or... getting to Target, so it's even.
26:44
Amazon's turning into Delta. We spent $10 in gas. We have a good car. It's turning into Delta Airlines. So what the realize is, is that- It's like you never land the plane right...
26:51
it might be easier to give up Amazon than you think. Yes. Yeah. Well, I make money off Amazon too sometimes. Right, right. I mean, I can, I c- I- I don't. Yeah. Yeah. I don't.
26:59
And I'm, I'm net up $1,500 from them probably a year. It's convenient. It's convenient for me to buy shit for my mom to get delivered to her house. Mm-hmm. That's- Yeah, that's actually a pretty good plan right there...
27:12
the one massive tether I have on them The, the, the convenience part is there, and the weird food orders- Nah, I don't even-... where we order a lot of weird Asian food that shows up... I don't indulge.
27:21
I don't, I don't indulge in the- I use it-... the order... I used it for chipped beef one time. It was very good. Right? [laughs] It's like- Uh, well-... $25 worth of chipped beef...
27:30
Cafe Du- Cafe Du Monde normally- Good... is about, like, nine bucks a- For chipped beef? A tin- For cafe. I don't know. Cafe. Coffee, coffee. Right. Coffee and chicory. And then, uh, but it...
27:41
There is a, uh- Wait, do you drink that shit? Hell yeah. I use it, uh, like a 50/50 with other coffee, so it's not- I hate you... it's awesome. It works out well. You have failed me in life. What are you talking about?
27:52
Chicory in coffee is like- Nolans... I might as well piss in my coffee- Dirty, musty-... when I drink it... yeah. It's terrible. Dirty, musty, dirty, musty south. Oh, God.
28:01
At least my coffee tastes- I'm sorry, listeners... at le- at least my coffee tastes- I'm sorry, listeners... like coffee. Musty ass coffee instead of like some r- r- r- r- No, no. No, no, no.
28:11
You will not change my mind- I have a funny story... on that one... after, after- But-... after the show's over, I got a great story for you... so I don't have to give Amazon my money for that because I know- True...
28:18
there's a sweet ass Asian store that has, uh, everything in the world live [laughs] and frozen and dead and everything else, and they also have Cafe Du Monde. And they have maggots, Michael. No. Maggots.
28:32
Well, actually they could. You're eating maggots, Michael. They c- well, probably. Uh, there was a story- I mean-... on NPR today about maggots and eating them, and it's like, eh. They are healthy apparently. Yeah.
28:42
Well, if, if, if- I guess we're gonna end up eating some of these... yeah, if you, if you grow them the right way and whatever. [laughs] If- But I mean-...
28:47
if you fed them only on Washington State apples- Yeah, if they were all-... they're very tasty... yes, if they were only feeding on, like, the best grass-fed Kobe carcasses- Right... kind of thing- There you go...
28:57
you know- Right... blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Of course you're gonna have the best maggots- Oh, th-... if they came from that which came of the YUB... these maggots came from Kobe beefs.
29:04
Oh, God, that sounds really nasty. I know. Well, yeah. I mean, we're eating muscle and we're eating steak. I mean, come on, let's not sugarcoat it. That's true. We're not that damn civilized, guys. [laughs] Right?
29:14
Well, we, we don't see it happening, so it's fine. We just have g- we're just good with our words. Yeah, and Kobe. Well- Speaking of Kobe, Kobe is looking at buying a Lynskey titanium gravel bike. I know.
29:29
He's been constantly communicating with me. Oh, is he asking you too? Yeah. Okay. I, and I love... Uh, that's why I sent him to you. I'm like, "Dude, you want a Ti bike. It's forever. Buy a Lynskey." Yeah.
29:39
I'm like, "You might as well do it if you're into gravel bikes." He's gonna, he's gonna have to buy... I mean, they... You can't buy that thing as cheaply...
29:46
I mean, you could buy it cheaper from them than if, way cheaper than if I bought it. Than building it. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, it's, they're, like, 50% off right now.
29:52
I- Which is whatever dealer margin there might have been in one... which is why I immediately sent him a link to it. I'm like, "Dude, you want a gravel bike," which is a marketing term. I'm like, "Go Lynskey."
30:00
Well, but it has 40s on it, and it can take 45s, so it's like- Right. Well, so it's a marketing bike- It's like a skinny-... but it's still cool... they're skinny mountain bikes. Right.
30:08
[laughs] That, that's, that's the new- With 700s or 650s... the new, the new term. I think I, that's a second new term. Skinny mountain bikes. That's- That's the second new thing I came up with this, just- Skinny...
30:17
today, just today. It's like you, you know what a flow trail is? No. It's like a mountain bike trail that's all flowy with nice curves and banks, and f- you can just jam on it. You're gonna throw out some crazy terms.
30:29
No flow Snowflow Snowflow. It's for when you groom something that's got flow and it's in the snow So have you ever heard the term- Snowfro... chin- Oh, no. [laughs] Have you heard the term chin nibbler? No.
30:44
So I was at Amorphic on Sunday and somebody brought their dog in, and I said, "Hey, can I pet your dog?" He's like, "Yeah, but I'm gonna warn you, he's a chin nibbler." Oh, boy. I'm like, "What does that mean?"
30:55
He's like, "Just bend down and you'll find out." [laughs] Oh. And I bent down to pet this dog, and sure as shit, he starts chewing on my chin. Yep, yep, yep. Like, gently.
31:05
And I look at this guy, I'm like- It makes sense... "This might be the greatest day in the world." It makes sense now. It sounds like a fetish thing to me. I'm like- That's what my-...
31:11
"This might be the greatest day in the world. Your dog only chews on chins." He's like, "Yep, ever since he was a little pup." I'm like, "I am so excited to pet your dog."
31:21
It's, it, and, and I might name my next dog- Chin Nibbler... Chin Nibbler. Chin Nibbler. Yeah. All, all rolled together, Chin Nibbler. What's your dog named- My-... Chin Nibbler?
31:29
My bob- my bobcat, when I have enough scruff, she starts to lick, lick, lick, and then becomes the rrr, rrr, rrr. Right. And then, and then it's like- Like sh-... whoa, hey, now... like gentle? Yeah.
31:39
One of my old- Well, no. It's a fucking bobcat, so no. [laughs] You don't have a bobcat. But- You've got some sort of- A bobcat strain... yeah. Bobcat strain light. Bobcat Light. Bobcat Light.
31:49
I don't know if my, my roommate had something similar- PCL... it was a Manx or something. Mm-hmm. But it was a hair puller, but only with women. So he'd, like, have a girlfriend over- Oh, yeah...
31:58
and I think the cat was jealous, 'cause the girl's hair would be laying over the couch, and he'd just go... [imitates cat grooming] Yep. Yep, yep. And shred it. Yeah. Uh, yeah, she'll do that to Kim, yeah, laying in bed.
32:10
Wow. Boom, and just, like, all of a sudden grab and yank and... [imitates cat grooming] [laughs] So Kim's your second wife. [laughs] Oh, yeah. Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh. All right, everybody. Well, I- We talked a lot...
32:23
I, I think we got through most of the stuff today We talked a lot... uh, if we didn't, we'll get to it next week. Chin Nibbler. Oh, you know what? I can take this off the list. The Blurple Omnium is going to Seattle.
32:36
You sold it? Nice. Guy's gonna come and pick it up on Monday and take it out there. I wa- I was gonna dr- I was gonna take a road trip, because the first quotes I got from- [laughs]...
32:46
like trucking companies were, like, $1,900. You know? It's like...
32:51
And both Brandon and I were like, "Yeah, we're not putting that back in a box," because even if it was originally in the original box, I s- still don't like shipping them via UPS. Oh, yeah.
33:01
So you pallet them and you ship them. Um, but I was like, well, if it's, if it's gonna... I might as well take a road trip. I can stop and see Ivan. Then Ivan said, "Well, you know what?" No one then.
33:11
"Maybe I'll, maybe I'll just jump in the car with you and go out there with you." Go to Seattle, yeah. And then come back, and then you stay here again, and then you go home. Is he still in port? Yep. Port Collins.
33:19
So anyway, but I got a guy to do it for 350, which I think is pretty good, and he's one of those guys that is sm- he's a small carrier.
33:28
He's got a van and a trailer, and he's, you know, he's conscientious and makes sure shit gets there in one piece and blah, blah, blah, so that's going out there. So I'm gonna take that off the list, 'cause it's sold.
33:41
Nice. Uh, you know what else is sold, is the, um- Yeah, uh- The large, uh, the large Wednesday's going out to Iowa, so. Nice. That'll make someone really happy. Chewie. Oh, fuck him. [laughs] Chewie.
33:56
When's he coming to Wisconsin, that fucker? Well, I told him he has gotta go to Shakers if he's gonna do ghost stories. Mm-hmm. Right. I don't know what else we got for ghosts. The Pabst Mansion comes to mind.
34:04
There's a few places. Mm. Been a long time since I've been at Shakers. Anyway. All right. Well, we'll do this again next week. Chewie, you watching? I don't know. Shake, shake, shake, Senora. Shake your body line.
34:15
Shake, shake, shake, Senora. Shake it all the time. Work, work, work. [rock music]
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